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Home Teachers in the Night

Lyrics

An old home teacher went out late upon the dusty town,
It was the last day of the month, the sun was setting down.
He called his partner on the phone and said "tonight we ride,"
They had to get their visits done before the morning light.

They dropped in on the first home in the middle of a meal.
The wife was quite unhappy but her husband knew the deal.
They took their time and rambled on; no lesson had they brought,
so by the time they finished, that food it wasn't hot

Chorus

Yippy-ai-oh! Yippy-ai-ay! Home teachers in the night.

The second home was longer still; that widow lived out far.
She had them boys a-choppin' wood and fixin' up her car.
She fed 'em cake and ice cream and made them clean their plate.
By the time those men got back to town the hour had gotten late.

With one to go before the dawn they pounded on the door.
The bishop's home was very dark the time was half-past-four.
When all at once the door flew wide the bishop eyed the men,
he cracked a smile and those two fellas, well, they ain't been seen since then.

Chorus


--Transcribed by Daniel C

Notes/Trivia

This song is one big inside joke for Mormons.
Chris's dad had the idea for this song while preparing a presentation on Home Teaching for a big church meeting. He called up Chris with a few lines of lyrics, and Chris wrote more lyrics and recorded it.
The song turned out so good, we asked if we could post it here on the moosebutter site.

The Ballad of Mr. T

Lyrics

It's 1983
Who do I see on the movie screen and on my TV?
A jubilee of anarchy
With his mohawk cut and his jewelry
That man's name was Mr. T

Saw him in Rocky III
Clubber Lang fighting Rocky
And he proceeded to knocky-knocky Rocky out
Title bout
Stone cold without a doubt

Yeah, but then at the end of the movie Rocky came back
Yeah, right!
That was so fake, that was so rigged!
I mean, you put Sylvester Stallone and Mr. T alone in a closet for FIVE minutes and YOU see who comes walking out of there alive!
It'll be Mr. T every single time, because Mr. T was so cool!

Mr. T! Mr. T!
You're the man I want to be
Mr. T! Mr. T!
In my dreams you're all I see
Mr. T! Mr. T!
You're big and round just like a tree
Mr. T! Mr. T!
You're A-OK with me

I loved his cartoon
Saturday mornings in my living room
And sometimes on weekday afternoons
He was so cool
You better believe I pity the fool
Who don't like his cereal
He's so untouchable he's almost ethereal
Like... some kind of... ghost or something...

Yeah, biggest, scariest ghost YOU'LL ever see!
But Mr. T, he wasn't scared. He wasn't scared of nothin'!
Oh, I know what you're thinking.
You're thinking, "Well B.A. was afraid of flying"
Yeah, right!
You know what that was? Well I'll tell ya.
That was a corporate lie made up by the executive producers so when he said, "How come that fool Murdoch get paid more than I do?" they could say, "Well your character's afraid of flying"
That was so fake! Mr. T wasn't scared of nothin'! He wasn't scared of nothin'! He was so cool!

Mr. T! Mr. T!
You're the man I want to be
Mr. T! Mr. T!
In my dreams you're all I see
Mr. T! Mr. T!
You're big and round just like a tree
Mr. T! Mr. T!
You're A-OK with me

I wanna meet Mr. T
I wanna see Mr. T
Eat, drink, and breathe Mr. T
Oh let me be Mr. T!

Where are you today?
B.A. M.I.A.
Was it the FBI or was it the CIA that took you away?
Or was it a UFO?
Where'd you go?
I'm telling you now the world sure could use a hero like you
You could even teach MacGyver a thing or two
About making stuff outta nothin'
Outta nothin'!

I mean, B.A., he'd have some car parts and a ballpoint pen and some... lettuce, and he'd make... a cannon! Or a freakin' helicopter! Outta nothin'! Outta nothin'!
He was so cool!

Mr. T! Mr. T!
You're the man I want to be
Mr. T! Mr. T!
In my dreams you're all I see
Mr. T! Mr. T!
Only you can set me free
Mr. T! Mr. T!
You're A-OK with me

I pity the fool who don't like Mr. T
I pity him
I pity him

Notes/Trivia

Written by Glen's brother Brandon, and recorded by Glen's old a cappella group Norm (wow, that's an old web page).

Glen sings the lead and also does the bad vocal impression of the drums from Led Zeppelin's "When the Levee Breaks". Oh, and he does the ethereal A-Team thing in the last verse.

moosebutter fully intended to resurrect this song, but somehow we never got around to it. Glen's probably too old to scream like this on a regular basis anyhow. But we can always bask in this recording of his insane rantings, preserved for generations to come. Enjoy!

Volunteer!

Lyrics

He's going to find a volunteer, yeah!

Notes/Trivia

Written to be sung while one of the group members wordlessly goes out
into the audience to get a volunteer.